Hello! I have been wanting to do one of these diaries for so long and I feel like its finally a good time to do it. If you don’t know, I’m self-teaching myself my A-Levels (the equivalent of the last year of high school) because I have a joint condition which causes me a lot of pain, and this coupled with anxiety mean that physically going to college is a struggle for me.
Because of this, I maybe only get there once a week (usually once every two weeks) and keep up with the work in my three subjects (Sociology, Film Studies, and English Literature) by myself. Though some of my teachers are fairly supportive, they have too many classes and are too overworked to spend the time I would need if I was to rely on them. So I’m armed with course textbooks, Quizlet, and a ton of library books full of essays and muddle through on my own.
Here’s my day!
Everyone has left the house and I’ve made myself some waffles and a cappuccino, now I’m ready to go. I want to spend a good chunk of today focusing on my dystopian literature, finish the ethnicity and crime section of my sociology, and make some film notes. As well as fit in reading some Children of Blood and Bone. We’ll see how that goes!
Time for a break! I’ve been really productive in this session. I worked on the power and politics of The Handmaid’s Tale and 1984 and managed to get my head around some of the more difficult concepts like panopticism, pseudo-transformational leadership, conformational bias, and of course Freud was thrown in there too. He manages to worm his way into all my subjects, I swear.
Now I’m going to head down and sit with my pups and read some Children of Blood and Bone.
I currently have my back taped up to see if it will help with the pain from my sciatic nerves. Part of my condition means my joints, muscles, and tendons move out of line and that can cause a lot of pain sometimes. These past few weeks have been especially rough, hence my physiotherapist taping me up. It’s starting to get quite painful now sat at my desk so it’s time to read, lie down, and get some puppy cuddles.
My pain has gotten a little worse so after I took that photo with the bow ties (for a party tomorrow), I laid down and half-napped, half-daydreamed and read 15 pages of Children of Blood and Bone. I had been hoping to read more before dinner but I think I needed that nap. Now I’m going to make some pasta salad for dinner and watch some xreadingsolacex on YouTube!
Okay so in the last half hour, Kav made me cry, I made sardine pasta salad, and walked the dogs. If you haven’t checked out Kav’s channel, you really need to. They talk a lot about diversity, activism, talk about some really amazing books, and is just in general a wonderful human being.
Watching their videos brightens my day when I feel myself getting down, whether that be from pain, studying, or anxiety. They’re just so positive and enthusiastic and I love it. I find this about Joce at squibblesreads and Emma at emmmabooks too.
I really want to make a blogpost about my favourite Booktubers so there’s a sneak peak of some of my favourites!
All tidied up and now I’m back upstairs at my desk and hoping my bones don’t throw too much of a tantrum. If they do I can easily lie down on my bed and work but today I really want to try and stay at my desk for as long as possible.
I did a lot of work on literature this morning so I’m going to switch to sociology. The section of sociology I’m studying at the moment focuses on the reasons behind crime and deviance, and the sub-section I’m focusing on is ethnicity and crime. I revise sociology by making notes from the textbook, using voice control to type them into a google doc, and then transfer them to Quizlet to learn from from there. If you haven’t heard of Quizlet, it is basically a revision website where you can make your own online flashcards and the website comes up with different ways of helping you learn them, e.g. mixing them up and you have to match them back, multiple choice, etc.
This way definitely helps me. I used to use paper flashcards but writing has become increasingly difficult to maintain and I’m a lot slower than I used to be so voice typing is a lifesaver. Plus, I have the Quizlet app so I can be studying anywhere and in as short a burst as I want.
(I promise I’m not sponsored by Quizlet!)
See you in a little bit!
I’m taking a quick break from sociology and I’m pretty happy with what I’ve managed to get done for it. I’ve made the notes and flashcards for half of the content for ethnicity and I’m understanding and remembering it pretty well, which is always good. I’ll have to try to memorise a lot more statistics for this section than others but I’m sure I’ll get there.
For now, I’m going to get dressed (yes I’m still in my Rudolf pyjamas) because I have
work at 5 o’clock and I like to be at least half-ready fairly early so I have plenty of time to wind down and not be stressed out. I work at a supermarket but my pain as well as trying to keep up with self-teaching is proving to be more of a challenge now, and so I’m leaving at the end of the month. My exams are in June and so I’m planning on using the months between then to fully focus on my studies, then have the summer to relax, unwind, read, write, and try to get my health in a better place.
Tonight I’m working 5-9 and will be my first shift with my back strapped up, which I can already tell will not be much fun.
I’m going to listen to the audiobook If There’s No Tomorrow by Jennifer L Armentrout as I get ready.
Future Abby here – or, for you, present Abby. Unfortunately, my day took a turn for the worst from here. As I was driving to work, a guy ran out in front of my car and I had to do a particularly violent emergency stop from 40mph. I managed to stop in time and he was okay but the jolt made all my bones slip out of place due to my condition. I was in agony but didn’t want to let my coworker (whom I love) down so worked for half my shift before I was sent home. I was kind of half-limping because if I limped too much on one leg, the other would flare up, and my coworker and manager noticed.
I’d done the most difficult tasks of the job so my coworker wouldn’t be too pressured being on her own and so called to be picked up – no more driving for me for that night. I spent the rest of the night curled up in bed, not moving, and full of painkillers.
I got myself a bit down that night about the whole situation, but looking back on this post, I see my day was more positive than I was willing to see then. I was productive, spent time with my pups, relaxed, made a beaut lunch, and kept up with documenting it in this post. I’m proud of myself for all of that.